Sunday, September 27, 2009

The next election campaign ....

.... is to make J. Carter Wood Guardian editor for all things German - at least he would know what he is frigging talking about. He would surely never have chosen this here picture to make a tasteless, racist comment on the German elections/electorate:



The subtitle to the photo (which is one of a string of other, similarly folkloric images from Honduras, Transsylvania and the Vatican) runs: "A woman wearing traditional costume casts her election ballot at a polling station."

No mention of context, no explanation as to why the woman might have donned this dress (Has she just hailed from a CDU election party? Her shift at McDonald's, where it's Black Forest Gateau Week? Or might she be suffering from a mild case of madness due to centuries of inbreeding?)

No: The dimwits at the Grauniad make it sound as if German women in the Black Forest simply wear this kind of Sound of Music stuff. All day long. Even when we're off to see our divorce lawyers, gynaecologists or, indeed, our favourite ballot box. Bobbly bits on our heads - we love it!

Dear, benighted Guardian editors: This country has reached the 21st century. Hitler is dead (though he might have been a woman). We have a functioning health service. And we are canny inventors/users of the Einhebel Mischbatterie - a sublimely practical device which you silly folk of showerless island dwellers still view with the same terrified disdain displayed by Catweazle when confronted with Carrot's electrickery.

So would you please f-off and write about Katie Price (the only topic you seem to understand)!

7 comments:

Ario said...

There's a vacancy up at Der Spiegel as well.

Oh them funny Southerners.

And Brandenburgers.

Right, where do I donate to the campaign kitty?

The Wife said...

Yes, you're right, I'm an angry old bitch, but note that these images are in the English edition of Der Spiegel.

Ario said...

Look carefully and you will notice that based on those pictures only German politicians seem to have enough money to buy suits.

But then, SPON International is rumoured to be mainly staffed by hard-boozing British interns.

I think a grassroots campaign for John as Editor of All Things German for any English-language newspaper has a lot of merit.

JCWood said...

I thank you all...well, both of you...for your expressed confidence in me.

The grassroots have, er, spoken.

I'll be ready when destiny calls.

Etc.

Am I right in recalling that you are an FDP supporter, Ario? Sounds like a topic for that there blog of yours....

I'll be interested to see what they actually make of governing. But there was some local word the other day of an internal report that suggests we're in line to get a new nuclear plant around the corner should the Austieg aus dem Austieg become a reality.

Looking forward to that.

Other than their sensible position on gun ownership, I didn't see a lot of promising talk from them during the campaign.

Ach, wir werden sehen...

Auf jeden Fall, schöne Grüße vom Rhein

Ario said...

Am I right in recalling that you are an FDP supporter, Ario?

No no no...! I am just a confused little thing.

My reply got a bit long and breathless, so I've parked it under my latest blogpost. Feel free to take up the chat/discussion there (or not).

Sonnige Herbstgrüsse zurück aus Leipzig

Aaron Strontsman said...

Did you notice that Tagesschau has a similar Hinterwaldler gallery? Look you here. Conspiracy, cry I.

Alyx Sands said...

Dear Mrs Professor Angry Old Bitch (remind me NOT to ever say that at uni, I'd die of embarrassment, being an Angry Old Eternal PhD student myself who most certainly shouldn't call the Head of Dept. a bitch, even when I adore her sense of sarcasm and humour!), I saw that picture, too, and was beyond writing anything sensible.
I was too upset about the election results anyway while being stuck in Cardiff (I did vote before I went on holiday). But I do enjoy your comments - a lot, actually! I just wish the Dept. and students knew about your blog- many of them would be quite surprised!
I also think many of your (and the husband's) blog entries should be published in a Proper Academic Book. Because, as we all know, Professors Need To Publish Serious Research.
Looking forward to working with you as a boss again (hopefully soon!),
your ever faithful admin servant,

Alexandra Velten (who also seems to have an addiction to curious run-on sentences - also, you said "friggin" and "f-off" *insert maniac giggling here*)